Helping your parents downsize is a journey, not just about boxes and belongings, but about memories, emotions, and a whole chapter of their life. It can be a big job, especially when there’s a lifetime of sentimental items to sort through. But by approaching it gently and gradually, it can also become a meaningful experience for everyone involved.
So, how can you lovingly support your parents through this process?
→ Start Early and Be Patient
Give yourselves plenty of time—this isn’t a race. Downsizing doesn’t happen overnight. Starting the process early means there’s less pressure, and it allows space for thoughtful decisions. Your parents might need time to reflect on what to keep, what to gift, and what to let go of.→ Take It Slow
Try not to do it all in one go. Going through decades of belongings can be overwhelming, so it’s helpful to break it into small, manageable steps. Maybe focus on one room or category at a time—like the linen cupboard or kitchen gadgets. A slower pace gives your parents time to reminisce and decide what truly matters to them.→ Sort by Category
A bit of structure can really help. Start with simpler areas before tackling the more sentimental ones. Grouping items into categories—like clothes, books, or keepsakes—makes the process more organised and less intimidating. Plus, ticking off small tasks can feel surprisingly satisfying. Involve the Family It can be comforting to know that treasured items are staying in the family. Before donating or discarding things, check with siblings or relatives—someone else might love the old rocking chair or mum’s favourite teapot.→ Donate to Causes That Matter
Letting go is easier when things go to a good home. Donating items in good condition to charities, especially those that support older Australians or families starting out, can give your parents peace of mind that their belongings will be appreciated by someone else.
Help Them Keep the Memories
It’s not always about the item—it’s about the memory. If parting with certain belongings is difficult, find creative ways to preserve the sentiment. Scanning old photos, recording voice messages, or creating a keepsake box can help your parents feel connected to their past without needing to hold onto everything physically.
→ Consider Professional Support
If it starts to feel too big, you don’t have to do it alone. A professional organiser can be a gentle guide through the process, helping sort, pack, and even find new homes for belongings. They’re great at making the experience feel less overwhelming and more manageable.
When my parents told us they were thinking about downsizing, we didn’t really know where to start—but we knew we wanted to help. So my wife, the kids, and I packed up for a weekend visit. We knew Dad had his eye on the tool shed, so after lunch and a bit of a catch-up, I casually asked him, “Want some company out there?” The kids were already pulling on their sneakers, excited to help. Even my wife, who’s more comfortable with a cookbook than a cordless drill, was ready to roll up her sleeves. When we opened the shed, Dad paused—it was full of bits and bobs from years gone by. Screwdrivers, boxes of nails, old tools he'd forgotten he had. We didn’t rush. We let Dad take the lead. “This one still works,” he said, holding up an old wrench. “Might come in handy someday.” So, we worked through the shelves slowly—one memory, one item, one dusty jar at a time. The kids were stars, happily sorting nails and screws into jars, making games out of it. That weekend wasn’t just about tidying up a shed—it was about being there. About showing our parents they’re not doing this alone. It wasn’t always easy, but by the end of the weekend, things looked clearer. Lighter. After that, we made more visits. One weekend it was the spare room. Another time, the kitchen. Little by little, the house became more manageable. And now, they’re in a lovely, smaller home—just right for their needs. Dad’s still got his tools—but these days, a screwdriver and hammer do the trick just fine.
